There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
