she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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