Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
