i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Randomize
