isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
