She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Randomize
