But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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