Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
