then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
