I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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