Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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