I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
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