Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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