It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
