so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize
