just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
He's a Shit stain on my heart
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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