I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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