We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize