i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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