It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
