Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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