White coat. Heels.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
no you cant smoke seaweed
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
