didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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