Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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