I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
