were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
