tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
