people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
