What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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