Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I just want nice things and good sex
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
