Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
