i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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