hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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