My brain says no but my pants say off.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
