I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
