i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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