It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize
