So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
My liver just had a heart attack.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Randomize
