I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
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