we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Randomize
