I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Randomize