Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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