I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I just had sex on a roof
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
