You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize