So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize