Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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