My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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