I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Randomize
