well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Need sex. Gaining weight.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
