drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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